“We’re so quick to cut
away pieces of ourselves to suit a particular relationship, a job, a circle of
friends, incessantly editing who we are until we fit in.“
– Charles de Lint
I am thinking A LOT. Okay, may sound weird but what I mean is - I OVERthink a
lot. I am that kind of person who would question every little thing that can be
questioned. What would happen if I do or say that? What would happen if I don’t
do or say that? What would that person think of me? Why would they think like
that? Thinking about unrealistic scenes in your head that will probably never happen
to you, or practising a conversation with someone you’ll probably never have....
Excessive thinking about a problem, while losing focus on the big
picture. The result is an overly complicated analysis, and any solution
coming out of this will also be complicated. And probably a fruitless
waste of time.
(definition of overthinking)
As
I read this quote by Charles de Lint it immediately got my thinking.
I got inspired by it. It kind of got me thinking about “cutting away
pieces of ourselves” - changing for someone or something “a relationship, a
job, a circle of friends”, literally EDITING who we are “until we FIT IN”. There
is so much truth behind those words.
Let’s just think about social media (Instagram and Facebook). People nowadays
are caught up in editing their photos for literally hours. For what? Likes?
Being famous? Acceptance from strangers? Not only being caught up in editing,
but being obsessed watching the likes and comments coming in, being disappointed
for only getting 50 likes on one photo. Of course, there is the enthusiasm and
love for photography and editing. Being creative. There is nothing wrong with that. But spending hours of your day investing in that kind of progress
(editing,worrying, watching your phone non-stop)? As cheesy as it may sound – I don’t
think it will make someone happy - longterm.
I am not writing this post to mock or complain about people on social
media (people who work with social media or people who spend a lot of time on
social media) but to write about my personal thoughts on it and my experience
with it.
I LOVE taking pictures with my camera, my IPhone or my Polaroid. It has always
been like that – beginning at the age of three where I’ve been confronted with
filming and photography by my parents. The result: eighteen years of footage seeing
myself growing up is absolutely amazing. So of course I kept going taking
pictures and filming from time to time while growing up. It was one thing where
I could be as creative as I wanted and I loved doing that.
At the age of fifteen Netlog came up. The predecessor of Facebook. I
think it was the first website where I put up photos of myself and my friends
and getting likes and comments for it. It was exciting and funny but it never
became an obsession for me. After “Netlog time” – I got into Facebook. It was
and still is a great way to connect with friends, classmates and family. I
remember spending a lot of time on Facebook and MSN to chat with my friends,
but not to post pictures regularly and writing what I am doing. I’ve been a shy
and quite person at the time – so maybe that’s why. When I posted a picture I was worried about
the reaction to it. Ridiculous. But kind of normal. I am so happy that my
childhood and teenage years were not defined by the “world of social media”.
Compared to NOW – where almost every thirteen year old girl and boy already has
an IPhone or IPad, and is registered on Facebook, Instagram etc.
Away from my storytelling and back to the quote by Charles de Lint.
While being on those social media sites we get inspired without even noticing. Both
– in a positive or a negative way. There is nothing wrong with getting inspired
for doing more work, being more productive, be active and getting fit. As long
as you stay true to your own self and don’t change your personality while being
focused on your life online or an online life from another person because you
think it all looks so perfect. Perfect body? Perfect style? Perfect
boyfriend? We are unconsciously
comparing ourselves to others and we shouldn’t do that. We should really focus
on ourselves, OUR personality, OUR friends, OUR live.
The result of my “overthinking” on this topic would be trying to avoid
checking my phone constantly, turning it off or on flight mode from time to
time in order to focus on what’s happening in real life and not getting
distracted by social media.
Life is beautiful, so don’t miss it.
